In response to "The Rain"

The following is a response to an e-mail I received from my mom. I don't get down to see the folks much these days because of the busy nature of my life these days, but I wanted to share this with you. Enjoy!
Witt

Hey Mom, thanks for "The Rain." I don't get the chance to talk to family members much when I am working at the nursing home, but there are moments when I get a glimpse of what Joyce sees every day; the long drawn faces, the here today, gone tomorrow eyes of those afflicted with Alzheimers and the restlessness of life grappling for a foothold on the edge.


I am just the guy who does the floors at night or the guy who fixes a leaky toilet or hangs a picture on the wall for a resident from time to time. I get to see what nurses and aides do every day and the faces of those who are suffering the symptoms of whatever ailment has stricken them. I was never a big fan of nursing homes because I always remembered the smells and the signs of the inevitable affects of time when we would go visit grandma. I miss the days when I could stop by her house and just visit for a while.

Some time ago my boss on days at the nursing home gave me the task of attaching side rails to the bed of a woman who was on hospice care. She did not have long to live and her son and daughter were there every day to sit beside her and be there when the time came. I knocked on the door of the room and told them that I was from maintenance with the side rails that had been requested.

The first rail went on without a hitch, but the second one was giving me fits as it was not fitting quite right. After several attempts and the advice of my boss, the rail went into place and immediately the woman lying in the bed took hold of it. I was moved to say the least when I had a moment to process what had just happened.

I remember quite literally lying on the floor beside the bed while attaching the rail to the bed side. I saw the catheter bag half filled, I felt the cool floor beneath my body and I don't recall any unpleasant smell of any kind. I remember the daughter standing there comforting her mother as she was struggling to get out of bed. 'It's OK Mom, lay back and rest," she said several times.

Restlessness is one of the signs that life is ebbing out of a person who is on their death bed. Needless to say, I felt quite humbled afterwards. I even found myself offering a little prayer asking the Lord to help me do this simple task as it was proving to be more difficult than I had originally thought. It was then that the son came over to lend a hand and everything fit into place. It just goes to show that we are all interconnected by a thin veiled string that binds us to a world that is as fragile as life itself. I think that if more people took the time to show a little more concern for others what a better place this world would be. It does not have to be any great feat of heroism or act of courage, just a helping hand or a kind word will do.

To close, I want to share a couple of poems:



Calling

You call my name

long after it has been forgotten

by all who say they love me.

You touch me

at the core of my being

while others have left,

believing there is nothing there.

You breathe love

into the vessel of my heart

and fill it with warmth and tenderness

even as others take from me,

my last gasping breath.

You hold me

in a sacred space

honoring me for who I am

while others honor me

for who they want me to be.

You call my name

and I am moved to tears,

because I too had forgotten

                     - Daniel H. Kim



Death Bed Meditiation

All I really know about life I can say

in a few lines:

In April the small green things

will rise through the black Iowa soil

wether we're ready or not.

The Carolina wren will make her nest

in the little redwood house

my son built from a kit.

Daffodils, tulips, irises will get the attention as usual

while purslane, pig weed, lambs quarters

will quietly take over a place

while no one is watching.

In June the corn shoots

will etch long green lines

across the dark loamy fields

and the greenest of all green grasses

will crowd into the ditches and line the roads.

In August the early bloomers

begin to burn themselves out,

but in September the late yellows appear,

luring the bumblebees and yellow jackets

into a frenzy of pollination.

You already know about October,

the color, the last burst of extravagant life.

And then all at once it seems

everything retreats, pulls in to itself, rests,

and prepares for the inevitable resurrection.


                                   - James Autry

I know this is an incredibly long e-mail, but the moment struck me with the arrival of a note from someone I care about so now I pass on a note so that perhaps you may do the same. The more people we care about, the more the world changes for the better. Please pass the word.

Thank You!

As I Ponder the Destination

    I am not ashamed to say I believe in the power of prayer or the God who saves. I pass on this message because I truly care and believe that our nation is being insidiously invaded from within. The communists of the Soviet Union outnumbered us with tanks, guns and troops and we still defeated them. The Nazis were well on their way to defeating Europe until we came along. The slave owners nearly tore us apart until the will of a praying man kept us together. The proof goes back to our founding that "With God all things are possible." Let us be true to that calling and pray like the lives of our children depend on it, which it really does. It is a time for spiritual warfare.




     I do not advocate the burning of books, whatever they might infer or suggest because I know that even the Good Book can have its message twisted to serve whatever means man wishes to use against his fellow man. I do not advocate the harassment of innocent people because of what they choose to wear as a symbol of their faith and I certainly do not pray for harm to come to people who choose freely the idea of liberty and come to the home of the free and the land of the brave. It is in and through these things that led the poor, the tired, the homeless and the restless refuge of the world to seek opportunity in a place to claim as their own and a chance to prosper through hard work, determination and in the hope in their children’s future prosperity. I can say I share in the words of a man who stood at the chiseled image of a martyred leader who came to terms with his humanity and declared the captives free in spite of the suffering and death caused through conflict.



     I believe in honor, dignity and the struggle to find personal integrity when all around is temptation, greed and the notion that no one individual can save the world for I know that it is true with God through the sacrifice of his only son. In fact, we are asked each day of our lives to put these very things in peril every time we dare to say a simple prayer in the name of Jesus Christ. Each time I ponder the image of a stranger standing beside the path to Jerusalem knowing full well the fate that awaits, I shudder to think what a weaker human being would have chosen if it had been any other than Christ himself. I wonder today my own destination and the path which leads to death and eternal life all at the same moment in time. What an awesome challenge to rise from slumber each morning and to know there is a way, truth and life in communion with a God who gives so much. May he make you consider your way and to change whatever lurks in the dark recesses of your soul that leads you astray. Amen.

Destined for Somewhere

I have had many things to think about and pray for over the past couple of months. Leading the way is a sense of profound gratitude for the simple things in life such as friendship, faith and opportunity. We are all presented with these wonderful gifts each and every day, but they all require attention and action. When they are left to ripen on the vine and go un-harvested, the result is a shriveled and rotting mess to be plowed under and left for the hope of next years’ crop. I am also reminded that there is little I can do alone without a sense of purpose and being involved in something greater than myself. For some, it is the purpose of raising a family, providing for a sick or elderly loved one or simply being involved in the community at large. These are all great and noble causes and I applaud every responsible parent, spouse and active servant; for we are all instruments of peace designed and formed in the image of a vessel that knows no limit or boundary when it comes to love. So, what is it that we cling to every day that determines the direction of our lives? What is it in particular that we notice in the common place comings and goings of a twenty four hour day?


Yesterday, I noticed a coyote crossing the road ahead of my car as I sped along a country road and shortly afterwards a doe and two of her yearlings jumping out into my path. If I had not been paying attention, the result would have been catastrophic; instead, I stopped and watched two determined animals continue on while the third scurried off too afraid to cross the road. I wonder how many times I have acted in this way and not proceeded as I originally intended. I wonder still how many times I have stopped by the roadside like a lone coyote and stared into the eyes of a passing stranger. The challenge is to first notice what is there in front of you and the second and most important is the next split second that determines the course of the rest of the day. Will you seek the opportunity and act, or will you simply pick from the dead remains of something left by the roadside to rot like a turkey buzzard does? That, by the way, was the third image from yesterday that still sticks in my mind. Like a vision quest I am determined and convinced that there is meaning and purpose in everything we do. Funny, how nature can remind us of things we normally might be completely oblivious to.

Finally, as I draw near to a conclusion; let these things resonate in your mind and heart: What is life presenting that requires attention? What are the things that provide opportunity and require an act of faith or simply the courage to proceed? Perhaps all of these things are just coincidences that have no particular meaning or maybe there are messages along the roadside that have gone unnoticed. For me, there is meaning everywhere and purpose abounds as long as I take the time to notice and proceed fully aware of the journey that gets me to my destination. What is your destination?

A Servant's Tale

A man came out of the forest for the first time. He did not know why, other than the fact that deep inside he heard a voice calling him out to see the fields, valleys and mountains that lay beyond the security of his forest home. The voice was neither male nor female, for it was a kind of longing in the man’s heart to go beyond himself and his natural instincts for self preservation. It came from the sound of running water that flowed as a stream through the heart of the trees. It came through the echoing cries of birds of prey and in the soft melodies of song birds in the cool morning breezes. It came from the world of people who lived as a community outside the captive boughs of the forest cathedral.


One night, the man had a vision as he sat beside the fire which he had used to cook his meal and warm himself. In his dream he could not speak nor move as he was startled to find a large bear had entered the light of his camp fire. Black eyes reflected back his fear as the man had forgotten the lessons of his father and the ways of his people who had raised him as their own. “Why can’t I move?” he thought, as the bear moved no closer. “Why has he not eaten me alive by now?” he wondered.

Then, he remembered: “I did not run because that is what a rabbit does to avoid the fox or the prey of hawks that scurry into their burrows for safety.” He stood up, filled his lungs with breath and raised his head and arms upward. In the shadowed light behind him there appeared a figure taller than the bear that moved about with the flickering flames of the camp fire. The bear, having seen this strange figure, turned and lowered its massive body and quietly left the man’s presence.

Servant leadership calls us out of the comfort of ourselves. It begs us to come see the vision outside our safe and secure world that we have known all our lives. It beckons, “Come, follow me, and I will make you see the greater picture, the mountain of which you have feared with small eyes." You will climb this mountain and know many days of hard work, toil and tears, but you will be a part of a journey shared by many. You will lead and others will follow, for you are called to be a servant of the people. You will care for the sick, console the mourner and bring joy to the small child who looks up to you with wide wonder. You will work diligently as the beaver does to prepare for winter and you will store up riches in the hearts and minds of those you serve. Though your instincts may seemingly fail you at times and the path become unclear; trust that the Great Spirit within you will provide all the necessities of life. To prevail on your journey is to become as light in darkness and warmth in the cold night to those lost and who hunger for meaning…

In Whom Do We Trust?

I’ve done a lot of thinking lately as you can probably tell. It seems like the time gets further and further apart between postings, but being preoccupied with getting back to work, raising two boys and the whole political scene these days have captured most of my attention. I humbly apologize for leaving those who drop by my den on occasion in the dark. I can’t think of anything more important than being there to help family, friends or a passing stranger in need; even if it’s just a word or two of encouragement.



Well, today began like any other day with the exception that someone sent me an e-mail with a link that stirred the writer in me to share with you. Now, I will tell you the corner of me eyes well up when I hear the National Anthem or when I see one of my scouts salute the flag or do something purely unselfish to help another person, but the following video says a lot why. This country of ours was founded by people who had had enough of oppression, persecution and intolerance. This is evidenced by the fact that some of our first citizens were those who faced religious persecution for their beliefs. They believed that God would take them to a land where they could freely practice their faith and thrive.



After more than two hundred years we have grown beyond the limits of the land to far off islands and snow capped mountains pristine and largely untouched by man. By the grace of God we have prospered, suffered, died and prevailed over every conceivable harm or ill will of other men. Why then do some insist that what we believe is evil or has no place in the public arena? Any religion can be distorted, fanaticized or used to bring people down, but our faith does not waver, does not falter and does not cause others to be put out. Some will give examples to the contrary, and this is partly so, but we are of human origin and we make mistakes from time to time, but what makes us unique is that we stand back up and hold to the principles that made our country great.



To what end is eliminating God from our national identity propose? How do we replace the corner stone of our nation with atheistic notions that denigrate manifest destiny? I believe we were led to this great land to prosper and bring new hope to a world lost in greed and selfish need for power. Please watch and listen to the following video. It says more than I can say here today. God Bless America!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVcoQcdjrsA

Reflection

As today’s scripture readings sink into my bones this morning, it is easy to see how Jesus was able to touch the hearts and minds of those he spoke to about his Father. Upon first thought I can see how many did not understand because they did not allow his words to sink into their hearts. They were too caught up in literal interpretation and assigned their own form of logic to a view that Jesus mentioned as “from below and not from above.” I am often locked in conflict with my own dealings with the world and the faith that is so hard to grasp some times. I often say to myself and others, “if only you could see things from where I am standing.”


Again, this valley of earth and the mountain top of heaven collide in ways that invite sin to cloud the view. This brings me to ask the question, “Why can’t I see you Lord when it appears you ignore my pleas for help and understanding?” Then it strikes me, it is I who digs up the seed planted in the earth of God’s creation. If I look closely enough the walls of this vessel close in and though it is the potter who formed my heart and soul, I cling to the ways of nature and not to the vision of the son. When I put aside the things of this life and simply believe, then the mountain top becomes visible and all returns to equilibrium. There is no earthly view that spares the cloudy sky, but when the heart and soul are opened, heaven becomes the bright blue sky with a golden orb to light the way. Stars reflect his presence by night as I slumber in the arms of grace.


Very few words describe how I have approached this day, but there are people living now upon this earth who I have met who could almost see right through me with just one glance. I am reminded that even human beings can become like Christ with enough time, patience and daily meditation on the mysteries that Christ revealed in his time among us in the flesh. He showed us that we can become more than just an earthly vessel, but a thing of beauty made to glorify our father in heaven. If only we seek the sky and not the dead ground beneath our feet. That is to say, to see as God sees and not as we would allow our nature to see.

A Letter To My Wood Badge Friends

For those of you who happen by from time to time, I apologize for not updating the blog much lately. You could say I've been a little preoccupied with life. The following is a letter I e-mailed to some friends I met last July through a Boy Scout leader course called Wood Badge. It's really not important that you know anything about it, but as I read it back today there is a mood and texture that I could not help but share. You will get a glimpse of my world and how important the connection between people moves me and inspires the writer deep in my soul.


Hey Beavers!

I was just sitting here reflecting on den meetings from last night and some of the struggles and challenges that I'm facing as I make the transition to unit commissioner. It's pretty amazing how far the journey has taken me from tiger parent, committee member, den leader to cubmaster. Like the climb Phil spoke about back in September at Camp Lakota, we experience the highs and lo's as we go along. Those two weekends at Wood Badge were definitely high points to gaze out and see the beauty of the "Big Picture." This brings me to our patrol meeting that last weekend when we had to elect a permanent patrol leader and the ensuing sharing of our personal lives.

Well, I don't know if it is just growing pains or that I'm starting to realize how much people have relied on me these past couple of years to keep our pack together or both. The problems I'm seeing are things that I can't fix and are topics that would be hard to teach in any leader training course. Life throws so many curve balls at us and it seems like times have become even more difficult with the economy the way it is these days. Maybe I'm just starting to get old but the level of commitment to things like scouting has really dropped off in this area of the woods. In some ways I'm questioning if I'll ever be worthy to wear those beads as I'm really concerned that the efforts to achieve them have been largely in vain. I'm hoping and praying that the leaders and parents in our pack will be committed enough to continue on.

We haven't heard from some of you in a while and I wanted to get a conversation going again. I know life keeps us busy with work, family and what not, but I'm hoping we can all take a few moments to simply put down a few things that have happened since we last met in September. As for me, I've pretty much settled in as a full time Dad and found that the longer I am away from the world of work, the harder it is to see myself back in the stamping plant on third shift barely keeping up on family obligations and that precious commodity we call "sleep." I'm hoping that a career change is not far off in the distance as the journey continues as steep and treacherous as ever. I am so grateful to Cory for his generous offering to help with his new business as it gave us a chance to re-connect and gave me the opportunity to see how scouting is done "Up North." (I promise to deliver on the rain check from the breakfast I missed last weekend). Lord knows we could use a shot in the arm here in Williams county Ohio! Pardon the pun as the flu bug caught up to me.

Now that my youngest son has crossed over to the troop and he proudly attends Boy Scout meetings, I'm struggling to get parents and especially my replacement cubmaster to let go of my shirt tails. Like young eagle fledglings teetering on the edge of the nest, it's time to see them fly on their own. The problem is they are not putting the effort in like they need to, or as I would like to see them do. Like my wife says, "You need to get out of the way Dale and let them go!" Believe me, I would like nothing more right now, but it is a struggle all the same.

Ok, now that I have put down a few things, let's see where this goes. Just a line or two will do and I promise not to jump your case if it's a, "hi, doing fine" kind of response. It was great to see Adam and Angela at our council combined meeting in Lima and the Klondike derby at Lakota. I was glad to meet Cory and Scott's wives and to talk over dinner at Applebee's in December. Phil looked spry and in good shape a couple of weeks ago at Cory's during our marathon laptop party supply session. Way to go Brad, I caught the balancing record on the council web site! Hope to see you all soon, especially when the beads start rollin' in!

Take care beavers, Go with God!

Dale